In mythology, vampires ate people in order to live forever. The blood contained life force which allowed vampires to live forever. They became super-naturally strong and healed wounds faster. The rest of the myths about vampires are rubbage. Kinda of like the bible is rubbage, but an useful book when you want to talk about myths.

In science, HGH stands for Human Growth Hormone. This hormone governs the way and speed in which humans grow taller/fatter/older/etc. Children have lots of this hormone, but when they become adults the amount of hormone in their BLOOD decreases. The older they get, the less HGH they have in their blood.

Pregnant women however have LOTS of HGH. So much that they actually (in a scientific sense) become YOUNGER when they are pregnant. When a woman becomes pregnant, their body starts producing more HGH so they grow the baby in their womb. This HGH also makes the woman feel more young and vibrant, making their body stronger and more able to defend itself in this time of need.

Currently, there is HGH pills on the market, but they are still being tested. No one knows the long-term effects of taking HGH pills. Yes, they are essentially a "fountain of youth" pill and they do actually make a person feel/look younger. A 60 year old person on HGH for 3 months looks like they are only 35 or so. If they were going bald, their hair becomes thicker, and their wrinkles fade because the HGH causes their skin to regenerate at a faster rate, thus removing excess skin which causes wrinkles.

So here's my theory: "vampires" drank blood because of the HGH in it. It made them younger and stronger and harder to kill. Thus myths about vampires were created by people who were plagued by "cannibals".

There are many different myths about cannibalism (and vampire-like creatures) around the world.

Some North American natives believe that eating the fresh remains of a killed creature will give you the strength or abilities of that creature. Eating the eyes of an eagle will give you better eyesight and eating the meat of a buffalo will make you stronger, etc.

I wonder if you ate another man's penis, would you (assuming you're a man) grow a larger penis? Maybe if I ate a woman's breasts, I would grow larger breasts?

The problem with eating the flesh of other creatures is that the proteins are slightly different. The human body has to modify these proteins before they can be used. Buffalo beef is different from human meat, so it takes time and energy to modify it so it is compatible with the human body. Eating human meat however means there is NO time wasted making the meat compatible. Instead it goes straight into our blood system and makes us grow stronger and regenerate faster.

Call it a Hannibal the Lector way of thinking, but the same goes for eating the brains of another human. Eating their brain tissue will result in that brain tissue being transplanted into your own brain. It might even be possible to gain knowledge and memories, provided that knowledge and memories isn't ruined by your stomach acids during the digestion process.

You are what you eat, so they say.

Pigs (pork, if you want to get down the name of the meat) are genetically very similar to humans. Pigs are surprisingly smart and have practically the same skin and hair tissue that humans have. Their bone structure is really the only major difference.

Which makes me wonder: Is the reason Jewish people can't eat pork because pigs will eat their own shit (which cats & dogs do too, actually), or is it because pigs are genetically similar to humans?

I don't know.

What I do know is that scientifically, eating other humans apparently tastes like pork, makes you live longer, makes you stronger (and if you eat their brains, makes you smarter).

So there you go. My philosophy on why humans "should" be cannibals.

But lets take that back to vampires...

Why do vampires eat young women?

Lets see, the younger they are, the more HGH they have. Bonus HGH if they are pregnant. You wouldn't eat an old person because their blood has less HGH in it.

Thus why men tend to die younger. Women live longer because of the extra HGH in their blood. Women who were pregnant 2 or 3 times, tend to live even longer.

Headhunters, cannibals, vampires... whatever you call them, I want to be one.

The only problem is its not legal. I'm not allowed to eat people.

Dammit.

Or is it?

Its only illegal to KILL people. There's nothing wrong with eating them.

Of course, to get the full benefits of HGH/etc, the food should be FRESH. So yes, you would have to kill the person and then eat them almost immediately.

How about capturing the person, and slowly drinking their blood on a regular basis?

And this is why I've confined myself to a mental institution...

Maybe there I can find someone there I would seriously consider killing and drinking their blood. And eating their brain too, while I'm at it.

And if I kill someone in a mental institution, I can definitely plead insanity, right?

How logical is that?

-Victoria Van Dyke
Gothic Artist & Cannibal
February 8th, 2002.

Cannibal #2: 2001

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